Every student carries two book bags to school every day, one seen and one unseen. No matter their age, each student has two book bags overflowing with stuff.The first book bag is the one we see thrown over their shoulder. It’s full of textbooks, notebooks, pens, and paper. They carry bottled water, gum, snacks, and sometimes last week’s lunch that got shoved to the bottom and forgotten.By the way, what is that smell in your car, son?

The other book bag, the unseen bag, is overflowing with the stuff of life.  This book bag is not fancy and it’s seldom ever put down, and never emptied out. Students carry this bag on their backs everyday all day.  The unseen bag is full of emotion, pressure, and a desire to belong.

Will I have any friends this year?
Am I going to get into college?
Why am I so fat?
Why don’t girls like me?
My mom wants to know why I don’t have a boyfriend.
Can I pass my math, science, or history class?
I’d rather have a job than go to school!
Are my parents going to get divorced?
Why does everyone hate me… especially my teachers?
Will I be good enough to get that internship?
Nobody loves me!
I think I might be pregnant!
My dad really wants me to play football. I hate football.
How am I going to afford tuition next semester?
Should I go to that party tomorrow night . . . remember what happened last time?
I have no idea what I’m going to do when I grow up.
I’m hungry!

This list could go on for pages, but I think we all get the point. The unseen book bag that is full of life is weighing our students down, breaking their backs and their spirits. Each year the pressure upon students to succeed seems to grow. Much of this pressure comes from adults feeling the pressure for students to succeed as well.As parents we see the struggling economy and are anxious about what it will take for our kids to be successful. So we push them. We wonder why our kids don’t seem to have enough friends. So we push them. As parents we want our children not to have to face the same life struggles we have. So we push them. We forget our kids might not want the same things we want. So we push them.Educators are faced with making sure students meet the standards set by others. So we push them. We want every student to get an A. So we push them. Our own performance is evaluated by the performance of our students. So we push them and push them.

Then they push themselves. They  push themselves to attain a standard the media sets that is unattainable for most. The feel the pressure to be liked, to be loved,  to matter, and all the while they have little idea of who they are or what they have to offer.

I’d like to suggest that we help our students with the unseen book bag.

1)  Allow you’re student the opportunity to put the bag down. Talk to them about the pressures they face.

2)  Emotions can be positive. Start filling the unseen bag with positive emotions. Tell students they are loved, that they matter, and it’s simply OK to be how they are.

3)  Help students navigate through the choices in life. Let’s stop telling them what we want from them, and start asking them what they want.

4)   Let’s start helping students understand that are uniquely created and have gifts and talents to offer the world around them.

5)  Allow students the opportunity to express their uniqueness. Let’s just see where they can take us with their creativity.

Lastly, will someone please find out what that smell is coming from that book bag in the car.